Stroke

December 30th was a good day. But the last good day. 

It was the beginning of a descent into incoherency. I saw the signs and willfully ignored them. 

Wrought with guilt, I feel numb with regret. I betrayed the confidence and responsibility entrusted to me. 

It's too late now. At 6:43 p.m. on New Year's Eve, I called the ambulance but the damage was done. 

Life has changed course in only a day. Any hopes or aspirations I ever had are gone. Conditions can only get worse from herein.

I know that self pity does no one any good. But it's hard to shake it off. I truly wonder if I should haven't been born. 

Everyone I know has suffered from associating with me.